Where We Truly Belong

​When the green outside is so plush and soothing it makes the mandatory blacks and whites seem unimportant
When the faraway chirping of an unknown bird seeks its way through music booming in your earphones
When the sky is an enormous blanket of the faintest blue and you gaze not realizing its been hours already
When the few drops of crystal clear rain light up your face a million times better than makeup could
When that cup of coffee in the verandah with nobody but the trees and grass makes life worth living
When you feel one with nature and not just a fading part of it
When losing yourself in the woods gives the pleasure that these concrete jungles can’t
When mother earth in all her raw beauty satisfies you more than these futile attempts at beautification
Maybe that’s when we realise we went a little too far, a little too fast
Because all that remains now is patches of her amid moulds and scaffolds, bamboo, tar and concrete
Because all that remains, is all that we’ve left behind…

Starlight

​Stars, sands and the sea witnessed

The newest, purest form of love

All night

Realistic, a future they planned

Learning, loving and providing each other with

Insight

Glee and happy tears, they both

Held each other in a tight embrace in the

Twilight.

To My Timeless Hero…

​My grandpa’s an octogenarian now
His feet dawdle, his hands tremble

His vision is blurred, his speech is slurred

He hides his watch and forgets his torch

The once know it all now struggles for recall
‘ Evils of old age’, I hear. Evil, really? 

As a toddler I was so loved, (still am)

I fell as I walked, made no sense when I talked

My hands all dirty, my feet all jerky

I hid all my toys, screeched at the top of my voice
‘Beauty of childhood,’ they say, and I agree

Why? 
Why’s old age evil and childhood the best? 

Those hands that made me, don’t they deserve respect? 
Grandpa spills food and it’s a mess to clean

I used to do the same, but cute it must’ve been
I cried for attention, and surely, I got tons

Now grandpa does the same, and he has none
He repeats himself helplessly, though no one really cares

My senseless blabber was attended to, like I had a story to share
And after he’s been told off, I catch him lost in deep thought at times, 

Helplessly looking out the window, I wonder if they’re same as mine
Grandpa spoke so passionately, of the happiness of holding our tiny little fingers

It is heart wrenching, you know, not being there to help with his quiver
The man who gave us his all, now just longs for reciprocation

While we’re busy fighting his age like it’s a monster with aggression
His brain is failing him and he turns towards his beloved  family
His ‘exasperated’ family instead, finds his ageing ‘ugly’
This was our chance, and we let it slip, for our ego is more important

Than to give back to them what they gave us- love, care, attention
Nature’s big plan now stands flawed, reduced down to a petty game
I’ve failed you grandpa, you know that too, and yet, you love me the same…

All That Changed

​I wrote my alphabet fast while he wrote beautifully

All the knowledge we had, few letters, A to Z

We were on the same page….

I was good with words, she aced her numbers

I helped her with essays, she rested my math fumbles

We were on the same page….

My feet had a thing for dance, he had wonderful music

Talent all the same, though different were our musings

We were on the same page….

She cared for homeless animals, I collected for charity

Both noble causes, no room for disparity

We were on the same page….

But now, we’re not

We’re not because he’s smarter, and I’m nowhere close

We’re not because she’s rude, and that, everyone knows

And let’s not accept that these are games my mind leads

That I had an hour more to dance and he, few to read

That she’s not rude, and that straightforward is the word

That I can mould anyone in my mind, decide their worth

We aren’t on the same page anymore

Not since I decided:

I’m gorgeous, she’s not

She’s ugly, I’m hot

He’s dumb, I’m smart

His words garbage, mine , art

We stopped. We changed

Where only bad could be seen, we changed

Where the mind took over, we changed

Each time I saw a flaw, I changed

Each time I laughed them off, I changed

That book of life flipped back a hundred pages 

Regressing from where I started, recovery will take me ages…..

(The diary of every ungrateful human)

Alone No More

​Jittery limbs and fidgety fingers

With mumbles for words and fumbles for speech

Fright in eyes and plight on the face

Superimposed by the incessant insults

Dejection, anger and a thousand other emotions

Not words enough to let them out

Cries unheard, pleas unattended

Another potential wizard fell pray to mental unease

Battling both mental and social demons

Alone, with nobody to even share 

The noose of depression tightens further

Each time another ‘normal’ person turns away

Let’s not contribute to their downfall anymore

Look them in the eye, say it like you mean it

Let’s do this together, through this ordeal, let’s walk

I promise to hear you out. Come, let’s talk 🙂

Moments Of Silence

​That silence of a mesmerized audience

The quiet after a fight

That mute second at the end of a song and the start of another

The silence in the arms of love

The quiet in endless star gazing

The hush hush tracing of a butterfly trail

The calm in my mother’s lap

The silent screech of a gramophone

The crunch of soil under tiptoe feet

The wordless poetry of raindrops

Those moments of priceless silence

Those that I left behind for future

The silence that got me through everything

That silence, I seek again…

For Angels Do Exist….

​Little eyes that blink with all their might

A toothless smile that lights up the world

She dreams of fairies and everything good

Blossoming flowers, chirping birds

Tightly clasped hands, jerky little feet

That’s all the emotion she has within

And a smile, a toothless smile

And a dreamland -mystical, magical

All that makes her happy, elves, angels

She dreams of them with shut little eyes

And then she responds to that one voice

The only voice she knew in the womb

Eyes wide open, she looks at the voice

Angels, fairies, and everything good

She smiles at her, her mother, her angel

Her first ever dream had already come true.

The Unbroken Promise

​I gave you my word, and lived by it each day,

“I’ll protect you forever,” you said, “come what may”

You broke your promise easy, left me scorching in solitude

Liberated, don’t you feel, of bondage of such great magnitude? 

Coming to think of it, you were right in doing so

A promise is no different from time in prison, no? 

A compromise on freedom to make your own decisions

Each promise a step further into a world of inhibitions

You let go of me, so I broke my promise to you

Did each of those things I swore I wouldn’t do

That I would respect women, be good to them always

See them as humans, not a good body, a pretty face

Yes, I broke my promise, not once, but time and again

Each time I remembered your deceit, it alleviated my pain

So many women, the bodies of whom I violated

Flesh the tonic I turned to, always, when dejected

Why did you, mother? Why did you let me loose? 

You’re the reason today, I stand behind this noose
“Protect you, I did, believe me when I say

From everything that I could, I stood in their way

I didn’t let you loose son, I opened you to the world

I didn’t influence, to you how the universe unfurled

I gave you life and values, dear, that’s all I have done

Your choices, your decisions, I swear I’ve made none

You thought I let go of you, broke all my promises

My womb bleeds in sorrow, though, stabbed with all your blemishes

This noose takes away your breath son, but I’ve been dead for years

With each of your promises broken, each innocent girl’s tears……

The Unfortunate Outcast

​A month passed by, eyes still fixated on the door

She waited for her boy to return like before

She didn’t cry over his corpse, didn’t mourn his death

Just waited, every second, each heartbeat, each breath

The boy she’d made, womb to bosom to mind

The truth of his life, naturally difficult she’d find

The only reason she lived, since the day he was born

Forsake everything for him, she would, she’d sworn

That purpose of life dead, unsure what to do

Wait for a miracle, impossible though she knew

Too afraid to end it , she decided to wait life out

Hoping he’d come, smiling, turn her life about

She wrote out the memory of that horrid day alright

Easier to think he’s alive ,but far, life still bright

Looking at that door in the hope that he’d return

For all the love she gave him, he wouldn’t let her burn

The door did open, but the faces weren’t known

They took her, they said, where she needn’t be alone

Left her in a dark room, one door, one room mate

Waiting was all left for her, she didn’t care for her fate

She looked at this door now, waiting to see him back

They called her crazy, laughed, “Brains, she does lack”

The mother whose revival could only be sought through her love

They “treated” her, to no avail, “mental”, in her face they’d shove

In that dark room, a loving mother, a social outcast

Awaits her son’s return, just to breathe her last

Is an asylum the place for love, so massive? 

Does healthy mean stone hearted, distant, passive? 

For all that she’s worth, mentally ill they wrote away

Who are we to judge? Her life, and she has no say…..

To The Light At The End

​I opened my eyes to a dark expanse,

As if that dream never ended after all

It felt familiar, this place that was

Familiar ground, familiar air

I walked towards I didn’t know where

Slipping at times, losing balance too

Pitch dark around me, yet somehow

Deep inside I knew, where I was headed

It got too cold and froze my steps

For what seemed like an hour,I couldn’t stir

Helpless,I stood right there, shivering

Headed towards nowhere yet, desperate to move

Finally I could and I ran forward, fast

It got really hot, scorched me down throughout

I ran to escape it, it tired me out

Drained me of my will, incapacitated me

Right then it got pleasant again,I ran faster

Familiarity rose to its peak, and I came to a halt

Pitch dark became shadows, shadows became people

People I knew, people I loved

At the summit of it all stood my mother

Glistening eyes, and a perfect smile

Dark, was it? She asked knowingly

Didn’t wait for an answer, added right in

The road to your goal is never well lit after all.