GONE….

They’re all moving constantly, at a steady pace
Most towards a goal, others aimlessly
So I joined in, one of those aimless souls
Stepping forward blindly, I’d follow where they’d go
Some reached their destination soon, and left the mob behind
Some had been walking forever, desperation filling their mind
Us, aimless walkers, had nothing for a motivation
Soon, the motivated ones, stopped walking, we were stranded
With nobody to lead the road, no footsteps to follow
We finally looked around, saw what we had done
Following them aimlessly, we’d destroyed all that was
In their bid for greatness, all that was great , was lost
That’s when I saw, that tree I cut down yesterday
It gave me a warm fire then, but now the scorching heat kills me
That’s when I saw the little bird, whose mother I had killed
It filled my stomach yesterday, but the little one’s plight hurts me
I looked up at the sky, which once used to be pretty
All that I could see now, was smoke, grey and hazy
I looked down at the ground, it used to be so fruitful
Dull, barren, cracked now, nothing could render it useful
I looked at the kids then, they used to look so happy
Shriveled, skin and bones now, robbed of all their merry
The women of my land, they used to be so strong
Fear is all I can see, they’ve gone through so much wrong
The men, they were sturdy, capable of such good work
Poverty and drunkenness have taken over, their sense of pride, now, hurts
I followed then through all their endeavours, not thinking of the consequence
They reached their goal, and here I am, filled throughout with repentance
I walked and walked, blindly so, changing the world around me
That was when I could’ve stopped, if all of this I could see
The damage done, everything lost, I can only watch it all go
I kept digging, deeper and deeper, but now i want to go back to before……

The Perfect Ensemble

I’ve always been amused by the tailor’s shop. The tailor measures you, from head to toe, marks lengths on the piece of fabric, cuts them to tatters and sews then all together into something wonderful. He creates for you, the perfect ensemble. He makes you look presentable that way. And weird as I am, I derived similarities between life and the creations of the tailor.

We all start from that nascent stage, from where we were nothing at all. You could call yourself a simple piece of fabric back then. Crude, shapeless, waiting to be transformed into something wonderful. Then comes along the tailor, experiences, in our case. They happen, leaving an impression on you, both good and bad. They prepare you for worser ones to come, give you good ones too. Time passes, the kind of situations you’re subjected to change. Experiences now don’t just leave a mark. Devastating ones happen, which rip you out, leaving you ragged, shaken. Good ones happen too, they cut you out beautifully, shape you delicately into something new. This continues forever -This leaving a mark, cutting you out, ripping through you….. sometimes you know it, other times you don’t. What comes of it in the end is just a reflection of what your life has been, ever since that day you were nothing but a plain fabric to today.

You are elegant and sophisticated, learning from all those experiences that ripped you apart and letting only the good times shape you into this person that you are, the perfect ensemble. Or you are those little pieces of the fabric, tattered and seemingly unimportant, the low times of life holding precedence over those good ones that should’ve. Is it, then , that we have no control over what we are to become, that circumstances in our life hold the key to shaping our being? Yes. But what actually matters, is how much we let these experiences affect us, and how. Extract the good from something bad and you’re gold. Try finding something wrong with the good, and tatters you’ll be. How little things help us draw conclusions and teach us life lessons just like that is amazing, isn’t it?

Weird are these derivations, but they really help you sort life. Weird, I tell you……

The Personality Lattice

Humans are incredible thinkers. Everything around us makes us wonder, leading to contemplation. One such day of random thinking opened me up to something we all choose to ignore at all times. Prioritization.

We often hear people advising other people to prioritise, to list methodically their line of action pertaining to a particular situation, or a particular circumstance. But we often overlook the deeper meaning that this very important word holds. Prioritizing isn’t just about arranging the people or the events of our life in descending order of their rightful importance. What it is really about, is giving ourselves importance. We have begun to base our lives on others’ opinion of us to such a large extent that the simple question of “Who are you ? ” asked by someone to us cannot yield a satisfactory reply. Because we ourselves are unsure of what we’ve come to become. What we are forgetting is what actually is the most important facet of our existence – our existence itself. What others think of us governs our lives, rather than what we think about ourselves, the simple reason being that we’ve stopped sparing a thought for ourselves.

A simple lattice could explain this all satisfactorily. Think of oneself as the centre of the lattice, tied on all sides to other people by strings, the strings being associations established with them over a period of time. We all start walking away from the centre, away from the people we’re tied to. Some strings break early, some others bear the tension longer, but break eventually. Walking away from the previous centre, we approach a new one, establishing new associations here while having to let go of old ones. The ones that persist, persist. This walking away, dissociation, approaching a new centre, and forming new associations goes on until at last, you walk to a dead end. Your end.

What we fail to realise is that everything that we allow to affect our lives are merely associations formed over time, some by choice, others by circumstances. No matter how much importance we give them, these associations are meant to weaken, if not break, at one point or the other. This may happen merely days later, or may stretch for as long as years, even decades, maybe. What remains of the association, is us, walking towards another entirely new one, seething in the sorrow of the dissociation of what we have just been through, not wanting to embrace anything new that could potentially fill in for that void. Like an artist, we spend lifetimes sculpting ourselves into persons worthy of being called perfect, and when we finally are that person, we stop respecting that creation ourselves. Won’t that equal insult, not respecting the person you’ve made yourself to be?

We live in awe of a person, while someone else lives in awe of us. We strive to become something we aren’t, while someone else strives to become us. In our bid for improvement, we’re only laying emphasis on others’ lives, while eating away from our own, little by little. Believing in ourselves and loving the human marvel that we create of ourselves as a mural of experiences seems like a difficult thing to do. Why is what still beats me. The human mind definitely thinks a lot…..